Now, this is big god damn news. Like whoa.

We have received our first donation. I am so unbelievably eternally grateful that it’s like my head is totally exploding all over my body and stuff. It’s actually kind of gross if you think about it too hard, so don’t.

Stephanie Jones, come on down! You’re the first contestant in what is sure to be a spectacular failure!

Now I kind of hope that this gets the ball rolling. I need to find time to submit the paperwork to make Full Contact Origami an actual company, but at least I know what to do.

People! Give me money!