As we can all easily imagine, helping your boss to write his resignation letter is a bit depressing. The even better part is a couple days later, when the big boss receives the letter and calls you to tell you that you need to start looking for a new job.

Needless to say, this puts a further damper on my plans of, you know, enjoying my summer.

It could be worse. I could have scurvy.

In the spirit of comedy, I took almost five months away from this blog just to see if anyone noticed. As expected, they did not.

In any case, there is a little bit to update. I wrote a new short called Love and Respect. Bonus points if you can figure out the inspiration from the title. If I ever get to make it, I plan for it to be pretty stylized and hopefully awesome.

Ah, there we are. Reread the last sentence of the previous paragraph again. If I ever get to make it. I’ve been, if not overcome, then certainly blindsided by a continuing comedy of errors.

The main concern has been entirely of my own doing, or at least is exclusively my problem. Aside from Love and Respect, I haven’t done fuck all for months. I don’t know why this has been a problem; traditionally, I tend to take on a lighter workload in the winter, for whatever reason, and get a lot accomplished in the spring and summer. Now, though… nothing. For months. (Well, as previously mentioned, there was something, but the point stands.)

Past that: still no actor for Transatlanticism. The storyboards have evidently disappeared from public view, as well. The camera front has been no better. I waffled on buying the Canon HV-10 because if was missing a few key features that I wanted, chief among them a 24fps speed setting. So what happens? They release a new model, the HV-20, that addresses every concern I have with the HV-10.

And then my source of funding runs out. So no buy camera for Full Contact Origami.

All of this has led to a monumentally crushing insecurity. I finally had to start doing stuff that normal people who don’t have to work for themselves in their free time do for fun. It’s interesting, I think. I bet it would be more fun without the god damn crushing weight of guilt that I should be doing something other than, say, playing Frisbee in the park or whatever. To alleviate the frustration, I’ve been rebuilding the Full Contact Origami site as a way to feel like I’m getting something done. It’s been working so far, but now I’m almost finished, and when that happens, I don’t know what I’m going to do with myself.

It’s all very annoying.

So: I wrote the shooting script for Transatlanticism in one night. I’m a little over halfway through mapping out the storyboards. I am under the impression that shooting has been delayed a few weeks because, while I do not have a problem shooting in negative degrees Celsius weather, many, if not most, of my volunteer crew do not seem to be eager to do so.

On the plus side, I have a crew. I didn’t even have to get them drunk. Yet.

It looks like my camera choice is good. Native 16:9 aspect ratio and high definition means that my job in editing gets much easier. The bad part is that I either have to get A) a new computer or B) more memory for my existing one if I am to take full advantage of the tools I need.

On an unrelated note, I’ve been afflicted with a soul-crushing insomnia lately. I’ll reach 24 hours in this most recent spell in about twenty minutes. I’ve slept an average of one night per week for the past three weeks. I’ve gotten whatever other rest that’s been from simply losing consciousness for one to three hours.

Needless to say, it is awesome.

I think I need to take a few days off of work. Seriously.

You know, I should probably start posting more than once every three months if I ever expect anyone to read this thing.

Ah well, maybe some day.

In actual news, preparations for the filming of Transatlanticism continue apace. I’ve cast the female character and I have most of the crew. I also rewrote the screenplay and am (still) working on the shooting script. There are only two things holding me back: uncertainty about the camera I chose to buy and casting the male character.

Casting shouldn’t be too big an issue, especially since I already know who is playing opposite him. However, I don’t know very many male actors, and there is a chance that I might be delayed rather than just going with whoever is available. We’ll see.

As for the camera, I want to buy the Canon HV-10. I could theoretically buy a better model, but I didn’t do too well in my donation drive, and I don’t want to spend $6,000 or more on something that might fail miserably. Nevertheless, I need to be sure it can do the job, and, well, I’m not. But I’m on it.

And… I think that’s all. I might be drunk, though, since I had four beers for lunch, so if anything comes to me, I’ll be back.

So, this isn’t going as well as I had hoped. I’m having trouble getting help from the city in getting Full Contact Origami officially registered as a business, because bureaucracy is only slightly easier to navigate than any given rampantly corrupt system, with the added trouble that bribery will get me nowhere. Probably.

Additionally, donations have been few, so few, in fact, that I can’t even add “far between” in there because there’s been only one.

On top of that, my bovine (ex!)cohabitor managed to get free with what is essentially $900 of my money. I paid her rent the last month of our time together with the intent of claiming her security deposit as my own in the future. However, her repeated failures to pay her rent with any semblance of timeliness and the fact that she left her room an utter mess made it so that the landlord exercised his right to take her deposit as his own. So I got seriously fucked.

Despite all that, though, I’ve made an executive decision: I am going to continue down the current path until the end of the year. In January, I am going to buy the best camera that I can afford with whatever money I have at that point and commence making a god damn movie. Because that’s just how I roll.

I’ve started preproduction on Transatlanticism, breaking the screenplay down into a shooting script and doing some rough storyboards. I’ve already enlisted some help with the production, and I should probably be able to fill out the crew with people who are friendly with me and naïve enough to believe that working for free is a good idea. Lucky for me I’ve met enough people to make it look like I’m remotely competent. I hope.

So, there are only three and a half months of me ending these (infrequent but soon to increase) posts with the missive that you should donate to me out of love or pity. I’m not particular.

Now, this is big god damn news. Like whoa.

We have received our first donation. I am so unbelievably eternally grateful that it’s like my head is totally exploding all over my body and stuff. It’s actually kind of gross if you think about it too hard, so don’t.

Stephanie Jones, come on down! You’re the first contestant in what is sure to be a spectacular failure!

Now I kind of hope that this gets the ball rolling. I need to find time to submit the paperwork to make Full Contact Origami an actual company, but at least I know what to do.

People! Give me money!

I sent the scripts for Hopeless Romanticism and Stardust Memories to an acquaintance with some connections at New Line Cinema. I don’t expect much, but a little can sometimes be everything.

Additionally, I’m trying to screw up the courage to ask a friend of my boss’s for help. Said friend is the father of Richard N. Gladstein, who has more than a few credits to his name and would be stunningly invaluable as a contact. However, I don’t want to cause any strain. We’ll see.

I’ve personally saved just under $2,000.00 which could theoretically be put toward the camera I need. Any help would, of course, be appreciated.

I also asked — nay, begged — Ultragrrrl to mention me on her blog. She hasn’t yet, but if she does, then this will be like some sort of meta-blogging with an infinite loop of links back and forth.

Please disregard the previous sentence. I’m drunk.

Unfortunately, I have yet to receive a single donation. On top of that, they improved the camera that I so heartily desire. Along with that, they raised the price by $2,000.00. So, there’s that.

Nevertheless, I’ve half-started preproduction for Transatlanticism. What I haven’t done is worked out just how I’m going to make that movie without getting sued. My hope is that, since Death Cab for Cutie made Directions, they have a soft spot for filmmakers and will give me a break once I make the movie.

So, yeah, I’m on tenuous ground here, eh?

Well, I’ve yet to see any donations for Full Contact Origami. That makes me rather sad.

On the other hand, I am getting information on how to make it a proper small business, just to give myself some extra kick-in-the-ass incentive. I don’t know exactly what I need to do yet, but, you know.

Also, it’s weird how things work out sometimes. The unexpected happens, and that’s neat.

I’ve begun to put the word out: Full Contact Origami is live. It is vitally important that I don’t blow this.

I would tend not to bother with the normal self-pimping that has populated my other methods of getting the word out, given that anyone reading has about a 99.999999% chance of having already seen the site and being subjected to all that it entails, but I will reiterate this point: please donate if you feel so inclined.

Not that I’m trying to guilt trip anyone or anything. But this is probably the first time in my life that I’ve ever done anything that is really important to me, and if it fails, I’ll probably go into a malaise that will end with me, alone, stewing in my own filth, tears flowing from my eyes.

So, you know, just a little something to think about.